


January

by ritalara



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Demiromantic, Demisexuality, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Season/Series 01, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-02
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-06-01 10:41:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15141344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ritalara/pseuds/ritalara
Summary: Skye realizes the team has not celebrated New Year's Eve and she's ready to give her OTP FitzSimmons a kick in the pants. Friends kiss on New Year's Eve, right?





	January

**Author's Note:**

> A little Bus era fluff & smut!

January 2014 | The Bus | Italy

It had been a couple weeks since they had found Coulson in the desert town and things were getting back to...normal. With their recent mission at The Academy under their belt, the team was stationed for the night outside of a small town in Italy. Coulson, May & Ward were meeting with some local government officials preparing for their next mission and Skye was on the couch in the common area of the Bus continuing her search for inklings of the Clairvoyant. It was getting late and she started to think about dinner as FitzSimmons came up the stairs clearly in the middle of an argument about something.

“Well that’s rich,” Simmons said, rolling her eyes as Fitz came up behind her.

“Oh really? You remember it differently then?”

“Yes - and as you well know I have an excellent memory.”

Skye smirked. FitzSimmons and the UST surrounding them on a daily basis seemed to have been stirred up after their trip to the Academy.

“What are you two nerds going on about this time?” she prodded.

“Oh Fitz is just still mad about the time I beat him in a drinking game on New Year’s Eve.”

“CHEATED is more like it,” Fitz said pointedly.

“CHEATED?” Jemma looked at Skye aghast, as if to say ‘can you believe this?’, “...I simply took the time to look up the RULES before we began playing while Dr. Fitz here chose to wing it.”

“It was a drinking game Simmons, you can’t have fine print RULES.”

“Well what’s the point of a game without rules?”

As they argued, the duo had begun working in tandem, gathering dinner from leftovers in the fridge.

“So tell me the story - was this another wild night in the Boiler Room?”

“It was in fact,” Jemma answered, handing Fitz the pasta to heat up as she began getting together vegetables for salad.

“It was our final year and even though we were young Simmons & I were both of drinking age back home - “

“So we weren’t shy when it came to putting our hands up for a go.”

“ - and it was the final round and Simmons & I were up against each other-”

“Fairly matched, I’d say - imagine some poor sap trying to compete with one of us.”

“ - well, then Simmons apparently had-”

“NEW YEAR’S EVE!”

Skye’s interruption stopped Fitz where he stood and Simmons squinted at her, confused, while Fitz did the same, his mouth slightly agape.

“New Year’s Eve! We missed it!”

Fitz & Simmons looked at her strangely. The first of the year had indeed come and gone without a particular celebration - having been in the thick of things with finding Coulson.

“Man... I wanted to get paper hats and streamers and see if we could find some fireworks.”

“Well there’s always next year,” Simmons comforted as she and Fitz continued, plating up dinner for the three of them.

Skye huffed and pouted slightly as she stood up to help them bring the plates to the small table in the middle of the common area.

“Or...” she countered, a big smile crossing her face, “we could make tonight New Year’s Eve!” 

Fitz stopped again, looking at Simmons with a ‘what is she going on about’ face and Skye rebuffed.

“You two aren’t fooling anyone with those less than subtle looks...come on! Let’s find some booze, champagne if we can, crack open a couple bottles and celebrate!”

She wished they could go out but they were under strict orders to stay put and maintain their cover while the others met with the Italian SHIELD contingent.

“The best part about New Year’s,” she continued, “is that you can make a party anywhere!”

Fitz still hadn’t said anything but thought for a second before turning back around to the fridge. He leaned down and rummaged in the back and pulled out a couple clinking items, then yanked open the freezer, grabbing something else.

Skye & Simmons had finished setting the food on the table, and Fitz joined them with the world’s oddest assortment of beverages.

A rogue Bendary English Ale, two airplane bottles of vodka, and a gifted bottle of Limoncello that their Italian brethren had given Coulson.

“Haud Hogmanay” Fitz greeted, as he piled them on to the table.

“Let’s save this for after dinner,” Simmons said, setting aside the Limoncello, “that much sugar on an empty stomach will definitely make us sick.”

Fitz twisted open the beer while Simmons & Skye each took a small bottle of vodka and they cracked them together with gusto.

“Slainte!”

“Cheers!”

“Happy New Year!”

“So what’s so special about New Year’s” Fitz asked as they tucked in to their dinner, having each downed their first beverage in one go.

“It's the best holiday. You don’t have to worry about gifts, you can find a party anywhere, and you can make it fun no matter who you’re with.”

“How about you?” she changed the subject, “What’s your favorite holiday?”

“Ha-o-ween,” Fitz answered with a mouthful.

“Oh I suppose it's a bit boring but I always like Christmas” Simmons smiled.

\---

Not much later the three of them had finished the bottle of Limoncello as well and Daisy was festively intoxicated. Fitz didn't seem to be too phased and Simmons was holding her own as well but was red cheeked as Skye laughed while they shared some British holiday traditions with her.

“New Year’s is a big deal in Scotland really - thanks for reminding us to do this Skye...makes me think of going to the festival in Glasgow with my mum.”

Simmons smiled at Fitz and put her hand on his knee, causing Skye’s lips to turn.

Jemma had become more physically attached to Fitz in the weeks following her near death experience, Skye had noticed. She touched his hand or his arm or his leg even more often than she had before.

Fitz was reacting differently too. Where he would have paid it little mind or returned her affections platonically, he was now watching her hands, following them back to her, glancing a little longer than normal when she’d smile at him about something.

Skye knew how close they were and had seen that they would do anything for each other. As she’d gotten to know them better she couldn’t help but hope that the two of them might realize there was something more than friendship between them. She almost looked away as she noticed the reddening of Fitz’s cheeks and Simmons’ eyes lingering on her own hand.

Fitz coughed (an obvious distraction as far as Skye was concerned) and began looking around.

“Simmons,” he asked

“Yes Fitz?”

She removed her hand from his leg.

“Have you seen my phone?”

She began looking around as well.

“I think you had it at your desk...when we were looking at the microprocessor.”

“Ah, thanks”

He popped up and jogged down toward the stairs, making his way to grab it.

Fitz was glad for an escape from the warmth of the top floor of the bus, the air in the belly of the plane cooling his reddening cheeks.

Things had gone back to...normal...after Simmons’ brush with death but the sight of her falling from the plane still haunted him. He had a strange urge to touch her more often than he ever had before - knowing how circumstance might take her out of his life made him ever the more aware of how much he needed her.

He shook the thoughts from his mind as he went to find his phone.

As Fitz made his way out Skye could SWEAR she saw Jemma watch him just a little too long and she figured it might be now or never to cut to the chase.

“Simmons. Would you just snog him already?”

“What?!”

She flipped her ponytail around as she stared at Skye as though she had asked her to switch specimens in an experiment.

“Call me crazy but I see the way you look at each other.”

“What does that mean?”

“Come on, you’ve never...”

“No SKYE, never. I told you, we’re best friends.”

“It's New Year’s Eve! Friends are allowed to kiss on New Year’s Eve...in fact, friends are allowed to bang on New Year’s Eve...I read it on the internet...”

“Skye - FITZ!” Jemma’s stomach tightened and her eyes widened.

Fitz had walked back around the glass partition and he looked awkwardly at them as he held up his cell phone.

“You were right, it was downstairs...”

“Fitz-” Jemma began

“Gettin’ late anyhow, we should all...” he trailed off, unable to look at them and walked away toward his bunk.

Skye’s eyes were wide.

“Jemma, I...”

Jemma said nothing.

\---

It was two hours later when Jemma couldn't stand the silence anymore.

She had gone to her bunk without much more word to Skye and her friend had texted her from her own bunk several minutes later, apologizing. Jemma had accepted kindly, she knew she meant no harm.

She hadn't been the first person to ask that question and as the years had gone by she’d become more comfortable with the notion that people didn't understand their relationship and that was okay.

It was natural, she supposed, for people to assume that as close as they were and after so many years together that they were, or had experimented with being, in a sexual relationship. People had asked her over and over, including her own parents, why she and Fitz hadn't taken that route, and while she understood where they were coming from it also gave her an eye roll.

She'd had dates and boyfriends (although it had been a while) and those relationships paled in comparison to what she had with Fitz. It annoyed her, the notion that their relationship was missing something because it wasn't romantic or sexual.

What was a boyfriend really? Someone who you shared your time with, your bed with?

But Fitz was more than a boyfriend to her - he was her partner. The notion that there was MORE to be had between them was kind of preposterous. They shared everything. Their work, their thoughts - even their emotional states were intertwined. They had been so young when they met, so awkward & shy, that it never occurred to her that under different circumstances there might have been an attraction. 

It wasn't that she didn't find him attractive, of course she did. He was fit, if not particularly muscular. Thin & lanky in a boyish way that made her smile at the idea of their first meeting at the Academy. He was handsome, if not in the same way as someone like Ward. His features were strong and his smile was bright and Jemma understood how someone would be lucky to have him as a sexual or romantic partner.

It was silly for either of them to be egged on by what other people wondered about their relationship and she hated the idea that Fitz was lying alone in his bed, feeling embarrassed, or even worse, guilty. The last thing she ever wanted was for him to feel alone.

Had the plane been full she might not have risked getting up, but with Skye the only other one there, she was not as concerned. She leaned across her bed, pausing a moment before knocking a familiar pattern on the wall she shared with Fitz, her ear pressed against it. After a few seconds a separate pattern knocked back and she got up, sliding the door open quietly, making her way next door to Fitz’s bunk.

Jemma noted that Skye’s bunk was open and unoccupied and she looked around the dark, quiet common area. Most likely the young woman was down in the garage, curled up in the back of one of the large SUVs working away on her laptop, or having fallen asleep. Jemma couldn’t help but wonder if she’d intentionally given them some space.

She made her way in and found Fitz sitting up in his bed, his tablet in hand.

“Hi”

“Hey”

“Fitz I-”

“Jemma you don’t have to-”

“I’m sorry about earlier-”

“- say anything - I know it was Skye who-”

“I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable-”

“-brought that up and-”

“-and I know you’d rather not think about the two of us that way-”

“-I’m sorry if you were uncomfortable, I wouldn’t want you have to - wait, what?”

“I know you’d rather not think about that, between the two of us.”

“What...what makes you say that?” Fitz slowed.

Jemma moved to sit on the edge of his bed.

“I mean I know it's been years and we've always gotten these kinds of questions, with friends teasing us...or in Sally Webber's case nearly locking us together with some sort of notion that...”

Jemma drifted off thinking for a millisecond what might have happened that night if Sally had followed through with her threat to lock them in the lab overnight...

“Fitz, I know that, sometimes, that kind of, talk, about, well, sex, isn't your... I know you don’t like when people make jokes and-”

“It’s not a joke to me Jemma”

Her chest tightened.

“What do you mean?”

“I don't...” Fitz looked down at a frayed thread on his shirt, “I know Skye doesn't mean any harm but I don't like people talking about us like that...you - like that. I don't like the notion of people thinking...it's none of their business.”

“I know, Fitz. I'm sorry.” 

She reached for his hand and Fitz sparked as she placed her palm on his knuckles. He knew it was meant as a comforting gesture but something had...changed. For weeks every time she placed a hand on his shoulder, his back, his arm, an unfamiliar zip of heightened response had struck him.

“I suppose I just try to let it go,” she explained, “I'm really just sorry if it made you uncomfortable or...”

“Jemma, can we...maybe you're right, it's just best to ignore it...”

“Right. I just don't understand all the fuss really. I've never understood why people think we must be some sort of friends with benefits...you’re...”

Her hand remained on his and she looked down, feeling a warmth of affection stirring in her chest. She moved it up to his forearm and squeezed lightly.

“You're more than that to me Fitz - you’re my best friend in the world.”

Fitz smiled at her and moved his hand to pat hers on his arm.

“I know Jemma, me too. You’re my favorite person, wouldn't have it any other way.”

She put her hand on on his knee again and they smiled at each other, a small and undiagnosed pain in the back of their eyes.

“Here,” Fitz said, opening up his arms.

They didn't necessarily hug regularly but Fitz knew when Jemma needed one and she smiled as she leaned forward, embracing him, taking in his softness. They held there for a while and while normally she would have pulled back after a quick firm motion, Jemma lingered, closing her eyes and taking in the feeling of him.

Fitz wrapped his arms around her and leaned back against the wall as Jemma sank in to him. He realized he hadn't hugged her properly in weeks, maybe months. He'd raced at her after the team had scooped her and Ward out of the ocean but her being soaked through had made it difficult to hug her properly.

Jemma was enjoying the affection as well. She had scooted farther up the bed and had her head rested on his shoulder. His torso was much longer than hers, giving him a height difference even as they were sitting and he had one arm under hers and one over, giving them a good position for a solid embrace. He really was the most important person in her life and she wanted to make sure he knew that, no matter what.

Jemma turned her head slightly. 

“Is this okay Fitz? Do you mind, I mean - this is nice to just...this is nice.”

“Yeah Jemma, it is...do you...here, let’s...”

As she pulled back to see what he was up to, he propped a pillow behind himself with one arm, keeping the other around her, and he solidified his seating. Jemma took note and repositioned herself slightly so that she had one arm under his, around his back, and the other across his chest, laying her head back on his shoulder, while he brought both arms back around her and closed them around her, pulling her snug. She smiled and sunk in to his touch. This was exactly what she wanted. This closeness with him was more intimate than some tawdry sexual affair.

Fitz closed his eyes and leaned his head back, smiling slightly, breathing in the light scent of her. Jemma was pressed against him comfortably, both of them in pajama bottoms and t-shirts, and he thought to himself that this might be the most at peace he had felt since they'd joined the team. While this particular type of...cuddling...if you could call it that, wasn't really par for the course for them, it reminded him of late nights studying or doing research holed up in one of their dorm rooms or on the couch in the Sci Ops break room.

Jemma breathed in and sighed contently while Fitz’s hand began to move motions on her back, a soft comforting caress. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling as they both started to lull in to a slightly hazy pre-sleep. It was late and they'd had a couple drinks and Jemma was the first to speak.

“This is nice,” she said again against his neck.

“Mmhmmm"

Fitz leaned over and placed a kiss on the top of her head and stilled for a moment realizing what he'd done. That was definitely not a familiar action. But Jemma didn't seem to mind. She returned a buss back to him on his neck in fact, and slowly, almost imperceptibly, something started to shift. Fitz’s neck tingled where she had kissed it, and his heart began to beat a bit heavier, faster.

Jemma paused, sensing his change in demeanor and she worried for a split second she had crossed a line. She opened her eyes slightly, to better take in their environment, and acknowledged that he was still holding her. His hand had stopped moving up and down her back and was in fact, resting close to her hip. As she took notice of it's placement she felt herself warming, a biological response to his touch and it made her look up at him. Fitz was looking down at her, his eyes sleepy but his pupils slightly wider than normal. There was an...aura...about him. Holding each other together like this, in the dark & quiet of his bunk. Jemma thought of everything they'd been through the past few months and how much it meant for her to have him there. To know that no matter what she had him by her side.

Fitz looked down at Jemma and saw a look of affection that he'd never seen before. She was looking at him like she was on the precipice of a discovery. He didn't want to look away but the intimacy of the moment was almost more than he could bear.

She saw the confusion begin to mount in his eyes and didn't want the moment to end. So, slowly, gently, she closed the gap between them and pressed a soft kiss to his mouth. She didn't plan it and she didn't know what it meant. She had every intention of pulling away quickly, having it be a brief display of affection - but the moment her lips touched his she waned into him. She hadn't anticipated the strong, quiet, pulse of electricity, or the way he paused then kissed her back.

Fitz was surprised, but not unpleasantly. He almost expected Jemma to pull away, kiss his cheek, and then settle back - or even get up and go back to bed - but as her mouth came in to contact with his she seemed to change course. She pressed her closed mouth against his and he breathed in through his nose, kissing her back firmly, his hormones awakening. Fitz kissed her again, soft, chaste, but with slightly more intent, and Jemma lingered her lips on his, not wanting to pull away. They parted naturally, still holding each other, and Fitz’s eyebrows were up, questioning, as their eyes refocused.

Jemma didn't know what to say. They had crossed some sort of line and she had no idea what it meant, what she wanted it to mean.

“Friends kiss on New Year's Eve,” she bumbled.

Fitz did not let her go but she could tell the moment was broken. He looked...almost... disappointed.

“Is that...was this a - a friendly kiss...?”

“I don't know, I suppose...”

Jemma looked at him, questioning everything she had done since she’d sat down on his bed.

“Do you...did you...is that something you, um...”

Fitz was becoming quickly dumbfounded. He wanted to ask if her if she had intended to kiss him. Was that why she'd come in to his room? Was that the reason she'd hugged him? Was this some sort of ...experiment?

“No...I, I didn't - I don't know Fitz, this isn't, I didn't...”

She wanted to kiss him again. She wanted to remind herself what it felt like.

“Did you...did you - was that, okay?” she asked him.

Jemma stomach dropped at her own question. She had no idea what she was doing.

Fitz knew his answer but it scared him. It was more than okay. It was wonderful. It was strange but it felt right, like a natural extension of everything they had together, everything he felt for her. The idea of doing something like this with Jemma hadn't ever been heavy on his mind. He'd never put too much stock in sex or even kissing - it never seemed to matter as much to him as it did to other people, and in his few experiences it didn't feel nearly as spectacular for him as he'd thought it was supposed too. But this was different. This was Jemma. She was...she was more than a girlfriend, more than an acquaintance he’d gone out to dinner with or a women he’d been dating for a few weeks.

“It was...”

He didn't have the right words.

“Jemma it was nice. I...I enjoyed it.”

The look of hope and relief on her face shot through him like a beam of light.

Jemma felt herself bubble as he told her he enjoyed it and she had no idea what had hit her. She wanted him to enjoy it. She enjoyed it. She wanted to do it again. She sat up slightly and looked at him directly, tentatively putting her hand on the side of his face.

“Fitz, can I...can I kiss you again?” she said quietly.

He nodded and moved with her as they connected. 

They kissed with intent this time, still unsure of where this was going. Fitz pulled her toward him gently as he kissed slowly, testing pressure and position. This was so new to both of them but they were eager to uncover more possibilities. They both tilted their head to their respective rights and Jemma’s hand moved under his jaw, her fingers brushing his ear and his neck.

She couldn't remember ever feeling this way about kissing someone before. This....connected. She hadn't imagined that their bond would translate to something like this but it did, wonderfully. She felt so vulnerable with him, so open, so emotionally intertwined. She'd never felt anything close to this with past boyfriends or dates. The thought egged her on and Jemma was enlivened to continue. She scooted closer to him, their bodies beginning to fuse, and she leaned in, smiling against his lips at the thought of where this could go.

Fitz had moved his hand up her back and was holding her like she might float away. He felt a slow, almost fuzzy sensation traveling through him, starting in his legs and before he knew it their mouths were parting and he didn't know where he ended and she began.

Jemma slipped her tongue delicately on top of his and he inhaled quickly, the feeling in his legs traveling like a shot to his crotch. Even with an above average understanding of biology, it was unexpected. His heartbeat rushed to his ears as his breathing quickened and he knew he had never been this aroused in his whole life.

What made it even better was Jemma. She was kissing him slowly, sensuously, and her hand was up the back of his neck, in his hair. He knew this was...something...different...for her too. He could feel it in her touch, the gentle and caring way that she held his face, and the supple, languid movements of her mouth. It incited him to feel her this way, to hold her, to know that this meant something to her beyond adrenaline & serotonin.

Before long they had slumped back toward the wall and Jemma was almost horizontal with him, kissing Fitz with every part of herself she could muster. Embers flickered across her body as they continued and he coaxed his unhurried tongue around her mouth. It was beyond amazing. As they kissed she felt her arousal waxing and and a slightly more familiar urge grew in her. 

“Fitz,” she breathed, between kisses, “would you like to - do you think we could lie down and keep kissing?”

His eyes popped up at the notion and every inch of his skin flickered. 

“Is that what you’d like to do?”

She nodded and kissed him with a subtle smile.

They repositioned in the dim light of his bunk, realizing the limitations of the twin bed, and Fitz went to his left side, Jemma her right. As they settled down he took stock of her and looked in mild wonder at the eager & peaceful smile on her face. A wave of endearment came over him and he wanted to find words for his affection, for this new attraction that was mounting quickly.

“Jemma, you’re absolutely beautiful,” he told her.

Her torso warmed at his endearment and she kissed him briefly, her hand back on his neck.

“Fitz, you are so handsome - and I’ve always known that but I didn’t realize until now how attractive you are - to me.”

With a slight blush and a large grin he kissed her, nuzzling his nose at hers, and wrapped his arms around her, bringing her back in to him. His fondness for her, his devotion, his attention, blanketed Jemma and she felt whole and safe in his arms. She was engulfed in amourous adoration & affection for him.

She kissed him back with a tender passion and soon their motions became firmer, more urgent as their tongues oscillated against each other and their caressing hands grew fervent. Jemma had no clue where exactly this was headed but she didn't want it to stop. Well, she knew a couple of places it very well could be headed, and she acknowledged fleetingly that the idea excited her.

Fitz was overcome with desire and a lust that was unfamiliar to him, born of his ardor for her. Before he quite acknowledged what he was doing he had moved his hand up the back of her shirt and he faltered as he took notice of her completely bare back.

Jemma moaned lightly and froze at her own noise in the same moment.

Neither of them moved until Fitz began his motions again and spoke softly as he continued.

“Is this okay?” he asked, kissing her bottom lip lightly.

“Yes,” she breathed, mouthing back back clumsily.

He kissed her again on the mouth, harder, then moved to her cheeks, her temple. He was absolutely enamored. Head over heels really. He couldn’t believe they hadn’t been doing this for years. He rushed his mouth back in to hers and pulled her against him, a sudden sensation growing more heavy in his groin and a clear, bright, stunning picture of the two of them naked, intertwined, in these same positions, enveloped his senses. 

He moaned in to her mouth and Jemma pressed her pelvis against his unwittingly. She felt his erection and realized how much she wanted to take his clothes off. What was happening? She was certainly acutely familiar with all the libidinous desires that drove mammals to copulate but this was not just that. She wanted him, she wanted to be with him. She wanted to take him apart slowly and put him back together with pieces of her. She wanted to pull down the zipper of his trousers and touch him and give him pleasure. She wanted him to touch her, to feel her skin, warmed by his fingers. She wanted every moment with him to be this close, this connected, she wanted to tell him everything about how she...

“Fitz, I think I’m in love with you.”

The words leapt out of her like a gust of wind and they both stopped. She couldn’t move, her body heavy with her confession.

She had never been in love before. 

She loved her family of course, she loved Fitz, she cared deeply for the other members of team, but this was different. This was attraction and attachment and adoration and amour and affection and somehow it had taken years for all of those things to line up with each other but as soon as it came out of her mouth she knew it was true. How could it not be? He was her everything. Her joy, her comfort, her peace. Her home.

She was in love with him. Indelibly. Immutably. Inevitably. 

She stared at him, terrified of what she had just said, but sure as the laws of physics that her feelings were real.

Fitz was shocked. Was he in love with her too? He knew he loved her mind, her heart, her curiosity. He loved the way she talked, the way she smiled, the way she laughed. Was that how she felt too? Did she love the way his nose crinkled or the way he looked at her when they stumbled upon an idea together?

“Jemma,” he started, breathless, “I...I think...I...Jemma, how do you know?”

She kissed him briefly and settled her head on his pillow, looking at him in wonder.

“You’re my favorite person in the world, Fitz. I love being with you, working with you, saving lives together and discovering a new world together. I love traveling with you and eating breakfast with you. I love taking breaks and drinking tea with you,” she laughed.

Fitz smiled and let her continue.

“But more than that,” she said with measure, “I love this...with you. This closeness - knowing you are the person that will be by my side no matter what. You are the person who knows me better than anyone else, the person who understands what I am saying, who listens to me, who shares with me. Fitz we’ve grown up together and somehow without realizing it you became a man that I...” her cheeks grew pink as she continued, “am aroused by, and attracted to...and with you, here, like this, putting all the pieces together, it just - it's effortless really. I love you.”

When she put it like that... of course he felt the same way. OF COURSE he loved her. Was this what it felt like to be IN love? To know a person so deeply and care for them so much that you would do anything for them? To want them to be happy and safe and loved and cherished no matter what?

“Jemma, I...”

“Fitz, you don’t have to say anything. I know you...I know you care about me, I know what I - I mean, I think I know...what I mean - to you...but we don’t have to rush anything - I don't want you to - my feelings for you aren't conditional.”

“Jemma of course I love you,” he sputtered.

“...like you - like you said - unconditionally...I don’t, my...I’m not just saying this because you...” he sighed - this was coming out all wrong.

It didn't matter to her. He loved her. 

Unconditionally.

She had never heard a more beautiful word in her whole life. 

His love for her was unconditional. She was not too much for him. She was not too loud or too bossy or too forward. His love for her was unconditional, irrevocable, the same way hers was for him.

She let him speak - she wouldn't dare to interrupt the life changing things coming out of his mouth.

“Jemma, I - I don’t know how I’ve been such an idiot. We spend every moment of every day together and I still can’t wait to see you every morning. I - I miss you when we’re not together. When I walk in to the lab each day and you’re there, when we share a cup of tea and you smile at me. When you...”

She was teary eyed as he spoke and now his eyes glistened.

“When I thought I'd lost you I didn’t know what I would...”

She leaned her face up against his and pressed her cheek to his, kissing the side of his face.

“I know...” she whispered.

He shook off his moment of sorrow and focused back on her.

“Jemma, I love you. You're my best friend in the world and the smartest person I’ve ever met and you’re absolutely bloody gorgeous.”

She beamed at him and realized it had been much too long since they’d stopped kissing. She moved back to his mouth and kissed him hard, full and purposeful - and Fitz responded quickly. Both his hands moved across her back and she quickly followed suit, roaming under his t-shirt. He kissed her harder in response and detached his lips from hers, instinctually pressing his warm mouth on her neck and part of her collarbone.

Jemma leaned back slightly and Fitz got a better look at her, his eyes roamed down her front, where her loose v-neck t-shirt showed him an outline of her breasts. He stilled at the sight of her peaked nipples under the cotton and his face fell immediately, nuzzling against them over her shirt. He was like a rocket launched without a flight path but he couldn't find it in himself to worry about it. He had never been this triggered by lust & arousal before and suddenly every single part of her was sexy.

The nuzzle of his face against her breasts sent a direct line of heat to Jemma’s innermost point and she moaned lightly, grabbing at his back, pressing his face against her. She turned on her back slightly as his weight moved and Fitz’s hands came around, moving the front of her shirt up. 

Before either of them said anything, Jemma moved her own arms, pulling them up in consent and Fitz followed the hem of her shirt with his mouth as he pushed it up. When it came over her boobs, Jemma reached down and crossed her arms to pull it off herself and Fitz continued, unwavering in his pursuit as his mouth and tongue swept smoothly across her torso. He burrowed his face between her breasts and she smiled as he kissed them, brushing his lips across her nipple and swiping it with his tongue.

She keened at the sensation and he brought his hands up to both breasts, moaning against her skin. She noticed his hard on growing against her hip and another pulse of pleasure hit her. Oh how she wanted him. She wanted him on top of her and inside her, firm and unhurried. She wanted to touch him, appreciate him, enjoy him.

“Fitz,” she asked, softly.

“Mmmhmmm” he answered, continuing his mission across the planes of her.

“I’d like to take your shirt off too. I want to touch you.”

She wanted to touch him.

Fitz was so enamored by his excitement for her that he’d barely started to consider the pleasure of her hands on him. He sat up briefly, and Jemma’s thoughts continued.

“Do you think we could - if you’re comfortable, we could take off our pajama bottoms too? We don’t have to decide right now what we’d like to - I mean, if you want to we can talk about it.”

He did want that. He wanted to talk too but he trusted there would be more time to talk before they made any decisions about what else they wanted to do. Right now he was very excited at the idea of being mostly naked with her and all the places they could touch and kiss each other with their underwear still on.

“I trust you Jemma.”

The words went straight to her heart. She didn't have much detail but she knew Fitz didn't sleep with people lightly. She knew he was not overly experienced with this type of activity and that sex and physical intimacy were closely tied to emotional intimacy for him.

For her the two had never quite intertwined and that had been okay. She had never felt that tropic pull of ‘can't eat, can't sleep, can’t breathe’ desire for a boyfriend or a lover...but this was close. This was more than sex, more than coitus. She felt every touch through each point of her nervous system, straight to the swelling in her heart.

They both shed their pyjama bottoms, throwing them on to Fitz’s floor, and he fell back to her, hands roaming, and lips following. Jemma enjoyed his hands across her curvature, taking in the feel of him as he caressed her shoulder, her breast, her hip, her thigh. He moved to kiss down her legs and while it wasn't the most erotic feeling in the world, she enjoyed watching him explore. He was eager and doting and hungry to enjoy every centimeter of her skin in a way she could have never imagined and never would have appreciated the same with someone else.

She giggled as he kissed the arch of her foot and teased,

“You’re really going for full coverage, aren't you?”

“Absolutely,” he smirked without a beat.

As he came up the other leg, her arousal increased as he moved his mouth up her thigh. She reached out for him as he continued his slow path up her stomach and back to her breasts and he fell on to his stomach at her side as he set up camp, kissing her nipple and sucking it in to his mouth.

Her center radiated heat, her legs warm as he continued and she wanted his hands back on her already. She admonished herself lightly for eagerness, encouraging herself to enjoy the moment. This was their first time - of what she hoped would be many, and suddenly she realized why she felt in a rush.

Her hand came down to Fitz’s head, and she spoke tenderly,

“Fitz, can we talk for a moment?”

He kissed her sternum and looked up, poignantly.

“Of course. Is everything okay?”

She smiled and nodded and ran her thumb across his cheek.

“Fitz, I just want to...I need to tell you, I need you to know...this isn’t a one time thing for me.”

He looked at her surprised, almost perplexed.

“No. Of course not.”

The notion struck Fitz strangely. Where would she get the idea that this was a one-time...

“Jemma, I’m not going anywhere...this isn’t...this isn’t just sex, for me. I don’t...that’s not...”

He scooted up and back on to his side so he was face to face with her.

“This is...you. This is more than any - more than any date or one night stand. This is. It's not even in the same category.”

Her eyes smiled, her heart full.

“Me too Fitz. Really. This is absolutely wonderful.”

She moved a hand to his face and continued

“Do you think...does that make us...?”

As she felt the question rise she knew what she wanted the answer to be.

“Boyfriend & girlfriend...” Fitz answered, “...for lack of a more appropriate term...?”

“I think it’s quite appropriate.”

“Girlfriend,” Fitz smiled, kissing her, “my girlfriend, Jemma Simmons,” he added, trying it on for size.

She kissed him sweetly.

“Hi, I’d like to introduce you to my boyfriend, Dr. Leo Fitz...”

Oh she liked that.

“This is Jemma, my girlfriend,” he kissed her again, “my girlfriend, Dr. Jemma Anne Simmons.”

She liked that too.

“I think,” Fitz continued in between kisses, already finding his way back down her neck, “that I like Jemma when I am talking to my girlfriend, and Simmons when we’re in the lab or in the field - what do you think?”

She grinned from ear to ear.

“It’s perfect.”

She leaned down and kissed him hard, both hands on his face.

“I’m assuming you’d prefer Fitz in either case, or should I call you Leo in bed?”

“JEMMA.”

His mother was the only person that called him Leo and she knew it. Fitz hated the name for a myriad of reasons and had spent years growing up trying to get his schoolmates and teachers and neighbors to just let him go by Fitz instead of Leo or Leopold. By the time he got to SHIELD it had been a breath of fresh air that all the cadets and agents went by their last name and Jemma was one of few people who even knew his first and second name.

“Hey, do you remember the Christmas you got me that engraved watch?” Fitz changed topic suddenly.

“Yes..” Jemma recalled.

It was their first year out of the Academy and she and Fitz had been on a tight budget, low on the pay grade at Sci Ops. She had found an antique watch that wasn't too costly and she’d gotten help from someone at Sci-Ops to engrave it for him: ‘L.J. Fitz’, the way he signed his name.

It had been a heartwarming and thoughtful gesture and as Fitz thought back on it he wanted to thank her again.

“If we’d been boyfriend & girlfriend then I would have said I love you, instead of just thank you. If we’d been boyfriend & girlfriend then I definitely would have kissed you.”

She was overcome with a smile yet again.

“If we’re going to go down memory lane thinking of all the times we would have kissed, we could be here all night,” she said fondly.

“Works for me,” he said, kissing her cheek again, and moving to her lips and her jaw.

As his mouth touched hers again she was incensed and reminded what she’d like to be doing for the rest of the night.

“I had something else in mind for the evening,”

He smiled against her breast bone as he continued kissing her and Jemma continued, a bit more serious.

“Fitz, I’d like - I’d like to have sex - I’d like to... make love...with you - tonight.”

He looked up at her with a heart stopping grin and said, 

“Jemma, what do you think I’m trying to do down here?”

She was floored. She realized what a fool she was being. He was taking things slowly, enjoying her, enjoying himself, and in the back of her head she was worried it meant he didn't want to have intercourse.

“Alright then.”

She sunk back in to the bed and breathed deep as he continued, letting his tongue lap across her, her nipples peaked with arousal. His kisses became wetter as he moved across each breast, and his hands moved down her hips and thighs, burning her skin with heat. As his mouth continued down towards her underwear, he kissed at the hem of the purple cotton and ran his nose along her lower stomach.

He moved his hands up cautiously and she covered them with hers, encouraging him. They pulled them down together and Fitz reached down as he pulled them off her legs, running his hand back up her legs, her thigh, and across her opening. She felt a sharp bolt of enjoyment as his fingers flitted across her and Fitz leaned back down to kiss her more - licking at her inner thighs, her outer lips. She sighed and he continued kissing her, parting her folds to lick up her center and Jemma moaned, high pitched.

He kissed again and she whined, realizing her volume,

“Fitz,” she whispered, her hand on his head,

“I think that's going to have to wait until we have some more privacy.”

He was mildly disappointed, but also a little relieved. He didn’t know precisely what he was doing and looked forward to some more time, space, and better lighting to explore that particular activity. He thought momentarily of when that might be, a far-off notion of a hotel room somewhere, in between missions.

“Perhaps we’ll have to find a hotel room somewhere in between missions” she mused.

He chuckled against her skin as he kissed back up her stomach, a new surge of his love for her spurring him on and Jemma welcomed him back in to her arms. He pressed in to her lovingly and she moved her had down his back to his boxer briefs, running her hand under the band and around his bum.

He moaned unexpectedly in to her mouth and it set her aflame. She pushed at his pants and he continued kissing her slightly uncomfortably, unwilling to part as he he helped her shuck his last item of clothing. Almost immediately, as he readjusted, Jemma’s hand was around him and Fitz groaned against her mouth again.

She had been eager to touch him, feel his smooth skin, his firmness and she worked at him momentarily, while his hand moved in tandem down to her opening. He played at her folds, stroking haphazardly against her clit and Jemma bit back a noise.

“Oh god Fitz, I’m ready.”

He nearly scrambled into position, any unsurity on the floor with their clothes, and placed himself on top of her as she schooched closer to the middle of the bed.

“Is this okay?” he asked, looking at her like she hung the moon.

“Yes, Fitz, it’s perfect...and I’m on birth control, by the way, and, I know we’re both healthy...”

She stroked his face and brought her hand down to his shoulder as she parted her legs further, Fitz focusing on their joining bodies as he moved in to her. 

His first motions were uncomfortable, both of them silent as they worked in to better positioning, and Fitz stared down at them, focused, working himself in to her. It wasn’t quite capturing the pleasure they had both been experiencing earlier and Fitz grimaced as he slowed down.

“Jemma, I’m so sorry, this isn’t...this isn’t very good is it?”

She didn't answer but pulled him down to kiss him and pressed his chest gently,

“I have an idea,” she whispered, a hint of seduction in her voice.

She turned to her right, pushing him toward the wall until they were both back on their side, and immediately she felt a much more enjoyable sensation.

“Here, shift down a bit,” she told him.

He winced as he removed himself from her and scooted down the bed.

“Lean all the way to your side,” she told him, kissing his shoulder.

As usual, he followed her instructions, and he stroked her back as she leaned toward him, placing one of his legs between hers, and hiking her far leg up high over his hip. Her heat against him made him pulse and Jemma reached down to stroke him again. Their position gave him a natural resting space in the crook of her neck and he pressed in to her hand as he breathed against her shoulder.

“Jemma,” he moaned.

She kissed his head as she opened her hips further and positioned him at her entrance.

“Try a little more velocity this time,” she coaxed.

She was using his own language with him and he pulled back, looking at her, his chest filled with love as he entered her, thrusting with more fervor. He slid in to her quick & powerful and immediately Jemma was careening with pleasure as he hit precisely the preferred spot. Being on his side gave him leverage and a full and spectacular view of her as he pressed on in smooth, deep, vigorous motions. Her head fell back as she enjoyed and he closed his eyes, becoming lost in her and their love making. His hands traveled a familiar path up and down her thigh as he held her leg over his, pulling her against him as he pushed in to her.

Jemma was completely gone, her hands thrown around his neck and her eyes lulled closed by her growing coils of climax. His thrusts continued and she pulled him forward, their legs twined together. Fitz slid his arm behind her, pulling their chests closer together and she tightened her hold on him, as her hips began to thrust and she she clenched against him, searching for release.

Fitz was immediately on the edge of his own orgasm, his movements fast and shallow, and she grabbed at at every muscle she could find, holding him into her, her body begging for his.

“Fitz, yes, don’t stop, don't stop.”

As she hissed in to his ear, he peaked, a blinding white heat striking through him and in to her, shattering him.

He fell back against the wall immediately, unable to continue even if he wanted to and he panted as Jemma leaned in to him, continuing kisses. He slipped out of her but could feel her rocking against him as he came down and kissed her back half-heartedly, his body focused on the sensations thrumming through him. 

There was no question that had been the best orgasm he’d ever had - the best sex, the best first time, the best intercourse. He was on cloud nine as she continued her kisses across his shoulders and his chest and he realized...

“Oh Jemma, oh my god, I’m so sorry - you didn’t - you didn’t finish. What a prat, I’m -”

“Fitz, don’t - this is wonderful,” she looked like she meant it, her eyes hooded, her body flushed, and he ran his hand over her back.

“Give - give me a minute and I’d like to...I’d like to try at least.”

She grinned and kissed him, laying back as he slumped to his side. 

He roamed his hand over her body, eyes closed as he caught his breath, and Jemma sighed at his ministrations.

“Keep doing that,”

He smiled sleepily, his right hand moving more purposefully as the rest of his body felt liquid. He turned towards her and leaned his head on her chest, both of them breathing heavy as he gave himself more room to run his hand up and down her torso.

“I love you Jemma Anne Simmons,” he said against her breast.

“I love you Leopold James Fitz,” she replied, his first two names a whisper.

As his body started to regain feeling, Fitz pressed a kiss against her chest, mouthing at her nipple while his hand traveled south and Jemma’s arousal returned swiftly. He positioned himself so that he had more access to her center, and he could easily reach her breasts with his mouth. He kissed the top of her chest and slipped his hand down the top of her leg, massaging her inner thigh and he considered going slow but thought of how much she’d enjoyed it when he’d sped up inside of her.

His fingers rumbled against her clit, stroking up and down eagerly and Jemma gasped as he bit down on her nipple at the same time. He suckled it as he circled around her clitoris with the pads of his fingers and then continued the strokes down, moving his head farther down, licking under her breast as his two fingers crested in to her.

She grabbed the hair on the top of his head and he grazed his teeth against her ribs as he began to pull back and forth in a scooping motion against her insides. Her legs flexed in exquisite pleasure as his fingers stroked her innermost walls and Fitz spoke against her skin,

“God you are beautiful,”

He began to flick his fingers, firm and fast against her g spot and his thumb moved in the same rhythm against her clit. She could barely breathe at the pleasure. How in the world did he know exactly what to do? How was this so perfect, so delicious? 

Fitz leaned across her body, taking her other nipple in to his mouth and began flicking it with his tongue, sucking it in time with his fingers and her vision started to tunnel as her climax began to crest. He moved his face to the middle of her chest, panting heavily as he looked down at his own hand, focused, working her fervently towards orgasm and Jemma stroked down his neck, grabbing it suddenly as the ripple crescendoed, a sonic wave of pleasure circling through her.

She moaned as the aftershocks hit her and Fitz could tell by the way her whining breaths shuttered out of her that she had cum. His hand slowed, and he kissed her stomach and then down toward her hip as he removed it slowly, running his hand back up her thigh lovingly as he kissed her side, her shoulder joint, and reached up to her neck.

She winced, oversensitized, at his mouth on her pulse point and he pulled away. She didn't speak but pulled him close, leaving his head warmly against her chest as it heaved with exertion.He rested his hand on her stomach, quite done for himself and the sound of their panting breathes filled the room as their heart beats slowed.

Jemma felt herself closing in on slumber and she combed Fitz’s curls as she mumbled,

“We should sleep.”

He huffed against her torso, kissing it briefly before getting up and he stood, bracing himself on jellied legs. He chanced a look down at Jemma, half asleep, her arms at her side and her ponytail crumpled on top of her head, with her beautiful naked body covering his bed.

He wanted to kiss her all over again. If he had the energy he would do so for hours. 

Instead he ran an affectionate hand down her leg and pulled open his top dresser drawer. He pulled a fresh pair of pants for himself, slipping them on, and the leaned down to grab he and Jemma’s t-shirts.

“Incoming,” he told her as he tossed hers lightly at her middle.

She barely registered, patting it on top of her stomach in recognition as he pulled his over his head.

Fitz looked at both their pyjama bottoms on the ground and knew they’d be too warm for them. He also imagined Jemma felt the same way about putting back on a dirty pair of underwear as he did.

“Do you want a pair of shorts, or...”

Jemma nodded and he smiled, enjoying the notion that he had pleasured her to the point of motionlessness.

He combed through the back of his drawer for a pair of Christmas boxers that he rarely wore, and he kicked the remainder of their discarded clothes out of the way as he moved back to the bed.  
He looked down at her, Jemma’s eyes finally opening. He smiled big and she grinned sleepily.

“I don't know how I’m supposed to move after that,” she said thickly.

“That good, huh?” his eyebrows bounced.

She giggled silently and his smile remained as she nodded. He leaned down to kiss her swiftly and then stepped toward her legs, the boxers in hand.

“Here, I’ll help you.”

She almost objected but instead bent her knees, lifting each foot in turn as he pulled the shorts over her calves and up towards her thighs. She was able to reach down and pull them over her bum and then begrudgingly sat up, pulling her t-shirt over her head.

Fitz stood next to the bed and dipped down as she finished, another quick peck to her mouth.

“Scoot,” he told her, motioning with his chin toward the other side of the bed close to the wall.

She glared at him in gest before moving enough to pull up the covers and push herself under them, pressing herself as close to the wall as possible. To their luck, Jemma was a side sleeper, and she put her weight on her hip as Fitz crawled into bed, falling on his back.

It took a bit of arm wrangling, but they found a good position, Jemma on her side, snug against Fitz under his right arm, with one of her legs over top of his. They both breathed in as they relaxed against each other and Jemma could feel Fitz’s heart pounding despite their relaxed state.

She put her her hand to his chest and looked up at him.

“Fitz, is everything okay?”

He opened his eyes, looking down at her with a tinge of anxiety and said,

“What are we gonna do in the morning?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean...what does this...how do we? I mean, we’re not going to be able to sneak around, or...we can’t just start sleeping in each other’s bunks every night without everyone knowing...and even...”

His stomach dropped.

“Jemma, what about the policy. SHIELD. No fraternization.”

She was quiet. Certainly she was aware of the policy. She also knew it was loosely enforced, there as a...a best practice really...and she and Fitz weren't a couple of adrenaline fueled field agents getting randy in the middle of a mission.

“Well,” she considered, “I suppose we’ll have to tell Coulson. It's his team and if...if he says we can’t...if he says we can’t...”

Even in her conviction, the words were hard to say.

“If he says we can’t be together and be on the team - or be on the team together - then we’ll go somewhere else. Together.”

Fitz stared down at her.

“Jemma, I wouldn't - we...you wanted so badly to -”

She cut him off.

“It doesn't matter. I don’t think he’ll give us an ultimatum but if he does we’ll go back to the Hub or take a post at the Sandbox...or...leave SHIELD if we have to.”

His eyes squinted with worry.

“Fitz, I know I wanted this more than you and I probably should have realized then that you’d do anything for me. Now I know I’d do the same for you too.”

“...you really don’t think Coulson will kick us off the team though, right?”

“I don’t.”

“Okay then, we’ll talk to him tomorrow. Together.”

“Together,” Jemma smiled.

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this Tumblr post - http://textsfrommyfandoms.tumblr.com/image/175311431950
> 
> This was meant to be silly and then got all romantic because they are in love dammit.
> 
> I absolutely head canon Fitz as demi-sexual and Simmons as demi-romantic so I wanted to really honor and explore that here. If you identify on the ace/aro spectrum or view Fitz or Simmons on the spectrum, I hope this rings true to you and welcome feedback.
> 
> I also have now a very robust and slightly sad head canon that New Year's Eve is Skye's favorite holiday because it doesn't require family. Fitz likes Halloween because candy & dressing up, and spooky pranks, and the history and traditions of Samhein also remind him of home. Simmons likes Christmas because she likes everyone being together around the tree with nog, and snow, and family and presents, and kids. 
> 
> P.S. If someone's interested in writing a Fitzskimmons version of this I would encourage it. When I read it back I realized how easily this little New Year's Eve party could have gone that direction but it wasn't the story I was trying to tell.
> 
> P.P.S I guess I am officially going all in with this 'together' end tag.


End file.
